Sex can be so confusing. My husband and I fought over it for years. His drive was stronger than mine. And no means no. But any no I gave made him feel rejected and emotionally withdraw. The solution for us was a friendlier policy of either partner can have sex whenever they want it. It felt like capitulation, but turns out it’s easy to get into the groove once you get past that first resistance. Now we both feel loved and valued and when we argue (rarely), it’s about other things.

Update: So many applauded for this comment, I was inspired to dig a little deeper and wrote a full-fledged story about it over here.