It’s hard to define. That’s what I tried to do in the piece! It’s a little psychological shift, that makes me feel we are equal in the sexual relationship. It definitely involved me demanding sex a few times when my partner wasn’t interested. That’s how I came to believe the surrendering goes two ways. For women, who have likely been oppressed via their sexuality for most of their lives, it’s important to feel like an equal partner. The word “friendly” was also key to me. I wanted to be friendlier to my husband. Once my resistance diminished, it was easy to get on board. I mean, even if you aren’t interested at the outset, a few minutes in you change your mind. Right? Of course, everyone’s psyche is different, and may take something slightly different to shift. Tell your friend good luck! :) Hahahah!

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Tree hugger. Tour guide. Top Writer. Feminist. Newly-baptized Bay swimmer. Editor of Fourth Wave.

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