I remember being told that no matter how imperfect you think you are, if you put a picture of yourself today in a drawer and looked at it in 10 years, you would marvel at your beauty. I don't mean to say that aging robs us of beauty. What I mean to say is we are ALWAYS more beautiful than we imagine we are. That convincing us we are not is a marketing strategy to get us to buy things, and a relationship strategy to control us.

Your point that we can define our own beauty is very important and true. But it's hard to do! Let me add that when you THINK you are beautiful, you ARE beautiful. A physically perfect woman who is insecure is not attractive. A physically flawed person who exudes confidence is perceived as beautiful by all who encounter her.

Beauty is a magic spell. It can't be pinned down. But we can learn to cast that spell on ourselves and others, if we wish to.

I feel what you're saying, and what Manto said, is more profound than that. But I wanted to add to the conversation.